Dear John McCain, Ask Me How Much I Care About "Your Health"

Posted by: Jen

Now I know this is a few days late, but I've been busy and I'm extra cranky right now because I just ran 20 miles in preparation for my next marathon. So seriously J. Mac, that was the biggest asshole move of the century. Thanks for telling me you could give a shit about my health -- as if we already didn't know from your stellar healthcare plan -- but I'm really glad you could drive it home and say you don't care about women. Please remember you are REALLY old and fuck you. xoxo, Jen

ALSO!

Dear Sarah Palin, stop shitting all over anything that's not small town America and then coming to New York City and saying "9/11! The Terrorists! USA USA USA!" Seriously, I refuse for you to criticize me for having all of my teeth and knowing how to read for one minute and then trying to unite with me over our (non)mutual hatred of the (OMG!!!1) terrorists the next. It's disgusting, cloying and if we ever met, my thoughts on you would be much more direct and succinct, that's to be sure.

I'm totes an American, so stop saying I'm not to rally to your stupid base that probably doesn't even exist. I hate the fact that you have a Joe Six Pack and a Joe Plumber and assume that your average American is a dumbass white male redneck, and he should be proud of it. All citizens should be insulted because I don't believe that your average American is really like that -- they are much smarter than you give them credit for. Also, last time I checked I wasn't part of the state trying to succeed from the US. xoxo, Jen

PS: Dinosaurs and humans NEVER co-existed, and most "average" Americans can tell you that, dontchaknow.