When Photoshop attacks

Posted by: Kim

Oh, dear god.

I think it's fairly obvious to anyone who has ever seen her before that Blake Lively is neither (1) a demon; or (2) a life-sized Barbie doll, complete with arms that snap off at the shoulder. Oh, W, W, W. How could you do this to our Serena? She's supposed to be pretty.

Another issue: Why is she dressed in what looks like it could easily line up in contention for My Birthday Dress of 2008 ... until you scroll all the way down to the bottom of the cover and see that it's a ... bright red pantsuit with a strapless, empire-waist baby doll top? Is that what it is?

Because it's either that or a strapless, empire-waist baby doll "dress" the likes and length of which even Little Jenny Humphrey hasn't even been bold enough to attempt, paired with ... red tights. ("TIGHTS ARE NOT PANTS!" -- Blair Waldorf)

But I can't tell, because that American flag is obstructing my view and, have I mentioned how fucking distracting her dislocated ARM is?!

Anyway. In other scandalous S news, last night's Gossip Girl was good enough, because, well, it is Gossip Girl and can never be bad, but sort of failed to impress as much as anticipated, what with Chuck not killing Dan, CreepyGrossAaron seducing Serena with photos of herself, and Jenny inexplicably screaming about how nuts Agnes is instead of knocking the bitch down and running off with her dresses (seriously, it was taking the girl 20 minutes to light the damn match anyway). But at least Wallace Shawn was in there being inconceivably awesome (ha. ha.) and Blair coined our (and by our, I mean the collective female population) new mantra, "I am Grace Kelly, Grace Kelly is me." And next week we're all thankful for Nate Archibald! Whee!

Fame: Barack Has It

Posted by: Jen
Our dear President-Elect (SQUEEEEE! Let me tell you how thrilled I am to say that! I really cannot describe how happy the outcome of the election has made me, but let's just say I am finally, for the first time in my adult life, proud of my country, optimistic, etc etc, USA!!!1, whatever...) seems to have reached the level of global superstar, and is being tracked by the paparazzi. Continue to be a rockstar, Barack! Oh and please make excellent decisions, govern well, and bring good changes to the country as president. I love you, now don't fuck it up. xoxo, Jen

Britney And Madonna!!!1

Posted by: Jen

Britney is back! Hooray! Apparently she did a guest appearance at Madonna's concert last night. She looks pretty! And cognizant! Britney, I never gave up on you, even when you insisted on wearing platform flip-flops around and subsisting on prescription drugs and iced frappuccinos.

Also, Madonna: holy thighs! I run marathons and I swear that is genetically impossible. Get down with your bad self!

People are being jerks today, so I'm looking at dresses instead of working.

Posted by: Kim

Dear Whoever Purchased My Birthday Party Dress of 2008,

Give it back. I need it. Unless you've been stuck with a Christmas-week birthday for going on 27 years too, you don't deserve it as much as I do.

XOXO,
Kim

The amazing site I found this on is here, and I would wear roughly 75% of these dresses. Unfortunately, roughly 85% of them call for a 23-inch waist. I know waistlines were higher back in the day, but ... I'm still thinking no.

Otters!

Posted by: Kim

I have already begun celebrating, and am appearing briefly here in my Merlot-fueled euphoria to express my joy that Jen has created an 'otters' tag for us.

In other news, Obama Baracks my socks off. Or something. Go blue! I'm looking at you, Pennsylvania.

Because Animal Pictures GO With Political Posts

Posted by: Jen

I looked almost as cute today when I was voting!

WHEN WILL THIS DAY BE OVER I HATE WAITING IT DRIVES ME CRAZY OMG OMG OMG!!!1

My plans tonight are 1.) Go for a run 2.) Go to bar and watch blue states light up 3.) Depending on outcome of how many blue states light up, run into street cheering wildly or drink more.

OBAMA FTW!

Posted by: Jen

Welp, tomorrow is the big day kiddies and we will be voting for Obama, in case you didn't know that by now! You all should too, dear readers, because this election is important, and I really think Obama is up for the job.

I am just really tired of people being closed minded, hateful bitches and would for once like to see the country elect a leader that is progressive. I am tired of the "us vs. them" mentality that so many on the right keep trying to play. I am tired of being called a fake American except when we are talking about 9/11. I am tired of people thinking its ok in 2008 to actively discriminate against someone for race, sexual orientation or gender. I am tired of people using religion for a reason to discriminate against others AND discriminating against people for following a certain religion (or not having one at all). I am tired of health care and the system being absolutely ridiculous (not to mention, "my health" being apparently unimportant). I am tired of seeing my tax money spent on stupid shit, like wars. I am tired of people refusing to believe that all people do not necessary come from an upper middle class white background and that not everyone has the same opportunities as others and then calling the less fortunate "lazy" for not making it. I am tired of being embarrassed of being an American, because you know what? People in other countries think we are absolute idiots over here, and from the past 8 years, I can't blame them. Let's prove them wrong tomorrow and elect a smart, competent, progressive leader for once.

Go Team Liberal Elitists!